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| I figured I'd just start it out on here, it'll gimme time to think, and be able to type instead of writing by hand n making my hand cramp. HEHE
Dearest Frederick M. Corpuz,
It is year 2007 and Thanksgiving is here once again. I am very thankful for a lot of things in my life, but what I'm most thankful for is you. I now know that there is a such thing called "TRUE" love and I found it with you. I never thought I'd be able to find LOVE again, but I did, and I'm glad that you are the person I am in love with. I'm thankful for a lot of things when it comes to you. So let me start off my list. First off, THANK YOU, for helping me get over the pain I was facing when we were first starting to talk and kick it. I was very lucky to have someone like you in my life. You helped me get over one of the most toughest times in my life and I thank you for that. Thanks for always being there for me when I needed someone to talk to, you always lent me your ear although you never knew what to say, you are a great listener! Thank you for being patient with me, I know I'm not the most nicest person in the world sometimes, but hey, I try. It takes a lot of effort to be patient with me and to me, but I look at you and it looks so simple for you to just be here with me. Thank you for always encouraging me to try harder and to do my best, you really have brought out the best in me, and I don't think I could have found my true inner ME without you, you complete my existence. Thank you for being there for me when I lost my Grandpa and also thanks for being there for my family. You are loved, but you already knew that. Thank you for always pushing me and making me more determined, because now I know what I'm going to school for, and its not only for me or my parents, its for you and also our future. I can't wait for it. I'm gonna love every single minute of it! Thank you for being the best boyfriend I've ever had in my life. I would only want you to be the one to take care of me and the only one I trust with my heart. I am truly blessed to have you. And last but not least, THANK YOU FOR LOVING ME, because without your love, I don't know where I'd be, you make my life complete and without your love, my life wouldn't be as bright as it is now and I wouldn't be the person I am without you. Thank you for EVERYTHING you've done for me and how you've made such a huge impact in my life. You are the greatest person who deserves nothing but the best. I Love You, Frederick Mallare Corpuz, with all my heart, for always! HAPPY THANKSGIVING! Sorry we can't spend it together, but you know I'll be missing you!! - with you | | |
| where to start where to start... how about about the week then?! hah okay..
well i've been unemployed for almost a month now, trying to get used to the fact that i have to have days where my ass is at home 5 days a week and only being able to go out on weekends. Another thing that helps me realize my soon to be life, is helping Fred with his homework. I help him type out notes for his weekly tests and help him memorize his flashcards for trade/generic of medications. Quite interesting as I watch my boyfriend study while my ass is bored off my ass, I try to read his books. FUCK, i'm really sad to say that I am going to start school soon.. WELCOME REALITY to my life. I guess it pays off shit. I need to better my life somehow, I guess it just scares me because this is a whole new thing to me, but I gotta get used to it. Hard work pays off. And I believe it. I see my brother and Fred, they are almost done with school. And I can't wait to finally be up there with them.. One year.. I'll get through it.. hopefully... =X
So yes, 5 days a week, I spend with my boyfriend who is at my house studying his ass off. It's like his at home library, since my dad likes to state that Fred already lives here, since Fred just loves to raid into our kitchen and helps himself to a drink and a snack n returns back to studying. GREAT. Oh and I love the fact that my dad just leaves us downstairs now, steals his laptop and has his cable upstairs. He's in heaven in his room now. Which leaves the whole downstairs area to me and Fred, as if it's our little apartment. Sounds great doesnt it? Eh.. sometimes, not when your boyfriend is studying and i'm entertaining myself on my sidekick or my laptop, or even just watching TV. Oh and might I add, the only time I really talk to my boyfriend is when we eat or when I help him study. Trust me I DO NOT MIND, because I know for a fact that towards the end of school is when things tend to get difficult. And me being an attention whore, I like to be tended once in a while. Which have led me n Fred to fight and argue more than usual.
Fred always says he'd make it up to me once it hit Friday, basically the weekend. Which I've lived to accept. I understand he's a busy guy, and don't get me wrong, I am always glad to know his presence is with me although we are not really kickin it, and he's kickin it with the computer. It's fine, because I know I want him to be able to pass his tests with good grades. So he's been studying flashcards a lot, since he had an interview for his externship and also an upcoming test. Which was fine. He got into Kaiser, which is a good thing. Gives him a better chance for a job when he's officially done with school. I'm very proud of him. He deserves it. I wanted to take him out on Friday to celebrate him getting into Kaiser for his externship, but since his Grandpa had passed away a couple of weeks ago, his cousins had all got together that Friday night to do prayer and to talk to their parents who were all in the Philippines, and Friday was that day they were actually going to bury their Grandpa. So I did not mind at all. Fred was there for me 110% when my grandpa had passed away, and this was the least I could do for him. I didn't see him pretty much the whole night, I spent my time with Bradley, who came along, Fred's cousin Erica Mae, Gretchen and of course Nessa. Didn't really bother me that I didn't see Fred throughout the night because he was hosting it since it was his house. So people end up leaving around 11 - 12 ish, so I finally get to chill with Mr. Frederick, he is yet again, very tired. We discuss plans seeing if it would be cool for us to spend sometime together the following day since we haven't had alone time in a long while. I get home to have him explaining to me that I put too much pressure on him and that he pretty much can't fulfill what I want. I, of course, am pretty sad. Let that nigga go to bed and as I tear a little bit, finally go to sleep. I text him in the morning, n we start to talk things out. Guess things were okay, but I still wasn't too happy. I guess it woulda been okay by the time I would see him later on that night.
I get home round 4 after cleaning up the other house and grabbing some jamba juice. Take a shower and get ready, as he does the same. He tells me he wants to take me to go watch a movie all the way in natomas. I wanted to catch an early viewing, so I left as soon as he told me what time the movie started. We head over to Regal in Natomas, and we watch Tyler Perry's Why Did I Get Married, which was very good I must say! I loved it! It was nice to finally be on a date with him again, since it was months that we had really been on one. During the movie, while nice little love scenes came on, I felt a tighter grab on my hand, as if he was feelin what the character was feeling.. I didnt know what was going on thru his mind, but it felt nice. As if we were starting to date all over again... After almost a 2 hr movie, we head back to Sac for dinner, he takes me to a steakhouse and we share a plate. Had a nice dinner, got to talking about things, and ended dinner with a good full stomach, and happy. We head back to Fred's house because we decided to go bowling with his sister, cousin and Bradley. Fred starts to feel sleepy.. AGAIN.
We get to the bowling alley a little passed 11. I suck at bowling. Low scoring night for me.. AGAIN. which is not new! Fred is STILL SLEEPY.. oh he was getting to me. His sister and cousin ask if he's irritated with the fact that they came along. But that wasnt the issue. The issue was about to be me in his face giving him shit on why he's always tired and when we're together he's always tired, even when he says he has enough sleep! Jerk. We were so going to box when we got home. Brad dropped us off back at Fred's a little before 2am. I go up to his room, n he's is FINALLY awake, so I'm the one who ends up being the "sleepy" one and he gets on me about it. Saying spend time with me before you leave. OH so now you wanna say something. JERK. hahaha this nigga.. man.. so whatever, I wake up and we start spending time with each other just talking. Talking about us and how we really needed our date tonight, because if we didn't we would have been arguing still. And I really don't like to argue with a nigga. We get to talking about how we are really happy with each other, and we won't let little arguements get in the way. And we both know we'll fight, but we will get through it all.. So as we lay, he asks me "do you love me" and I do say yes, but am too scared to say the 3 words that will prove that I do.. He pulls me closer, comes to face to face, eye to eye and says to me, "Babe... I Love You.." I was speechless.. and it came out, as if it were the perfect moment and I reply back, "I Love You Too." and there it was.. I am in love now.. something I never thought I'd ever feel again. Thinking that love would never be back in my life. But here it was, in front of me, along with the most perfect guy i've ever met, someone I am proud to say is my boyfriend. Fred loves me.. and this is real this time. Because I now know, that this is the guy I want to be with for the rest of my life.. As if all my dreams just came true in 1 minute.. Here it is now and I cannot fuck this one up.. Or I'll regret it for the rest of my life..
This is the guy that I love, and he loves me too.. and the feeling I feel right now, I cant even start to explain, but I do know that I am extremely happy, and I don't want this feeling to end.. I'm back in love again, and for sure this time, it's the right guy... I love him.. and thas the truth.. | | |
| So another day, I had spent with my God Daughter Kaelei Elise. We had lots of fun today.. haha.. I love being with that girl! Anyways, so today, I finally recieved the DVDs of my Grandpa's funeral.. I manned up and watched it.. I cried.. A LOT.. but kinda stopped.. i was sad to relive it again, but then again, he had a really beautiful ceremony. I miss him.. I guess I just wanna spit out how I feel about everything now.. I take it day by day, to accept the fact that my Grandpa is no longer here.. It really kills me inside to be very honest.. I mean, yes, I am very content with my life right now. I feel as if finally things have been turned around for the better, and things did change for the best. I have found a school that I am finally gonna be focused in, my real friends have supported me through everything I have faced, my family has become more and more of my backbone then they have ever been, and finally, blessed with someone special who feels the same exact way as I do. What else could I ask for? MY GRANDPA BACK.. It's not right to live my life without him.. because I knew he was still able to be kept here, but those nurses didn't even try. And that's what breaks my heart, and it pushes me to not be those types of nurses who neglect their patients. I promise to do good in school and try my hardest to get through the struggle, and just be determined to finish. Tired of being in community college, feeling as if I'm in high school, and getting nothing done. I'm done with that. I wanna move on and start young. So by doing this nursing program, I feel I'll be doing so much more for my life, not only for myself, my parents, my boyfriend, and especially to continue making Grandpa proud. Anyways, I got kinda off subject, but yes.. I feel as if life is seriously not the same anymore, how could you adapt to change so easily, and this it what erks me, my Aunties, May and Grace, have been totally inconsiderate. At first, when the family was here, it seemed as if everyone finally got kicked upside the damn head and realized, we have who we have, and that us, the Gancenia Family, and at first, it seemed as if we were all about Family, but when money started to get in the way, things just went back to how they were. I can still remember how Grandpa always wanted the family together, so why can't we just do that? May and Grace, have clearly disrespected my Mom, who is mourning the most, because she always has to face the issues of financial problems. And May and Grace don't make it any better. My mom is still making payments for Grandpa's funeral, because someone didn't pay either. Ugh. I hate this. Just so many problems, and I know for my mom it's even harder for her, especially being so favored by my Grandpa. Another issue that we have is taking care of Grandma. My family, The Etrata side, have no problem having Grandma over here just to keep company and to take care of. I love my Grandma. But for her own daughters, May, Grace & Melita who don't even want to take care of her, that pisses me the fuck off. She lost her husband, the love of her life, their father, and they can't even take care of their Mother? Someone shoot them. That hurts me. How inconsiderate can you get. I just cant believe how much has changed.. I go visit my Grandpa on a weekly basis, and I always tell him how I feel, I try not to cry, but I always do.. Things aren't the same, I wish you were still here with us, I wish there was some way I could have been able to help you more than I did. But I tried to do all that I could do. I hope you saw that Grandpa. I wish there could have been a way for us to be together as a whole family before you left, and for all of us to tell you how much we love you. I know at times you could be an ass, and we all know that, we face it with our parents, but you are OUR grandpa, and thats who you were, and we loved you for it. All the times you would talk so much shit, even when it was funny, we look back on it and we laugh. But we miss it so much, I want you back. Having my birthday party this year, I was waiting for you to come through the garage door like usual, walking in front of Grandma, for the ass that you are, but still.. you weren't here.. I bet you would have been so surprised to see that hennessey bottle too! =/ I guess I have to live with it now.. you're gone.. and I can't bring you back. I can't believe that I'm no longer going to see you.. hearing you say BERRRRY GOOD when we sing, even when Monique sings and it's terrible, you won't be there to egg her big head on to think that she's good.. Or you just spitting out weird shit when you get drunk with my dad and the rest of the uncles.. what are we gonna do without you.. it just doesn't seem right.. for you to be gone.. it doesn't make any sense. Why'd you have to leave. I sound so selfish, but my gosh, life just turned around for all of us, you're gone, and there's nothin we can do to change it, nothing we can do to bring you back.. When I looked at your picture on my birthday, I became an emotional drunk. You weren't there to add an extra 10 dollars to my birthday gift, you weren't there sitting in your usual spot at the dinner table...Its not and never gonna be the same again, and I know it's going to take forever.. my heart is still broken, and it's gonna take a while for it to heal.. I miss you so much, you don't understand, those phone calls when you're looking for mom.. just everything. My heart breaks to even pass by my bestfriend's house because I see your boat just chillin there, and it's no longer goin to hit the river, because you're not in it.. I miss you so much, not a day goes by where I don't think about you.. We wish you were still here with us, but even though you're not, please watch over all of us, and protect us. And of coures, always know, that I love you so much.. and although I never showed it, (just like you), know that I do, and I always will.. Rest in Paradise Grandpa.. I'll be missing you always... | | |
| hello to all that still decides to read my blogs, i know i havent been here for a while, so i decided to give you guys something to read.. you know an update..
well to start things off.. i look back at the things i have blogged about in the past, and for the damn record... ALL THAT SHIT IS DONE WITH.. I can confidently say i have moved on with my life, onto bigger and better things for myself, and I'm so glad that all of that bullshit is done because my life has been better than before..
So what do I have to say about 2007...
I started the year off coming back from another vacation from the Philippines, going back to CRC for another unsuccessful semester.. I hate how time flies.. I came back to my good friends though which was nice.. Thinking that this year was gonna be better than the last, I was completely wrong... Things went downhill pretty early in the year.. and it didn't stop..
February, my Uncle Leo, had passed away due to colon cancer. He was my best friend, Brad's dad. I could probably say it was a very tough time in my life, I can actually say I was really close to my Uncle, also to the fact that this was my best friend's dad.. I had to be there for him and his family, since they are too, my family. I dedicated most of my time to Bradley and his family just to keep them company and to also help around the house until his mom, Auntie Emily, was able to get through her days... I spent pretty much after school, before work, after work there.. just to keep them company until they all fell asleep..
March, Daddy turned 50 this year.. I don't really think he's happy with that.. haha but he's still good and healthy.. Monique is 10, Grandma is 76.. How time flies.. I hate it seriously.. So another birthday took place this month also, Manong Darel, 27, celebrated his birthday at Taro's thanks to the "wonderful" party planning of Jennifer, who wasn't considerate towards Charlyn and I, knowing that we weren't able to make it to his birthday celebration. We both didn't really care since we were working anyways. So, during the first couple of months of 2007, I was still involving myself with my ex boyfriend, Archie Munar... UNTIL THIS NIGHT... I had recieved a text message from Ella, saying that he had showed up with some girl by the name of Vanessa, and they were gettin a little friendly.. towards the end of the night, it was obvious that they were more than friends. HAH! This guy really thought he could get away with such a thing. That night I decided that I was done with this bull shit. I had to let it go once and for all. And I did. I ended things with him, cut him out of my life. Which was a good thing, because it was time for me to finally open up my options, open up my door to so many other things in life.. I think that was one of the best decisions and changes I made in my life...
April, I was getting by, although it was hard to get used to, I cut off connection with Archie completely, passed him by at school as if I didn't know him. Although it killed me inside, I could feel my heart healing, and I felt so much better about myself. I had a lot of pride building up, I was able to put shit aside and proceed with my life. I felt grown up and more mature. Ella turned 23, Brad turned 20... and of course SPRING BREAK! Which was I must say, an very unforgettable one, getting high with our fellow P.I. student, Shaun Quismorio.. oh I will never forget that night, how we asked the guy inappropriate questions, and recieving answers, while he gropes me and Charlyn.. haha, B.E.C had bay trips every week.. Us 3 made the most of things, through thick and thin, we created memories together.. This was our highest peak of our friendship I must say, not only spending time with each other at work, or even @ Brad's house, just how tight our bond was. We had no boyfriends or girlfriends, straight single and just enjoying life. I started to hang out at Abner's house, due to Jennifer, because she missed me and wanted me to come over and hang out. Abner, the sweet guy he is, had welcomed me into his home, but with a wonderful idea, to hook me up with his good friend Fred.  I thought it was crazy. I didn't know the guy. But I wasn't going to be scared to kick it with him. I'm single, I'm open to options.. I'm open to anything now.. I'm enjoying life, because no one is holding me back any longer... I start to hang out with Fred a lot, might I add, he is 8 years older than me.. which I didn't think anything of cuz we really just got drunk every Friday.. so I never really thought of anything..
 May, Amee is 1!!! Nessa turns 23! So, I continue my usual visits at Abner's and Fred starts to meet me there.. We really get into talking and having conversations that end up lasting til 3 in the morning.. Fred and I decided to start texting and AIMing each other, and our conversations still lasted til 3-4 in the morning. I felt as if I was in high school again. It was fun. FINALLY! Someone to talk to, someone to keep you company. Yes, I admit, I developed a crush on him. He was different, he was driven and determined. Might I add, a Pharmacy Technician student.. Maybe things could be turning around for the better? I was hoping so.. Fred and I had finally kicked it alone, since we were always surrounded by friends, except for our every night conversations.. we finally had a REAL DATE.. we went to Scandia, but they kicked us out since it was closed, we decided to grab some sushi that was nearby, then went back to elk grove and watch a movie, which I'd like to state was the crappiest movie i'd ever watch, but I had fun just being with him in that movie theater talkin about how lame that movie was.. After the movie I had dropped his ass back to his house, and we stayed out side talking since he wanted to tell me how he felt. After about 30 - 45 minutes of cupcakin, he finally admitted he had feelings for me, but wasn't ready for a relationship, I too felt the same way.. so we both decided to let fate take control of us, and let WHATEVER HAPPEN, HAPPEN.. I was happy.. all the pain i felt, was gone.. I moved on.. and I liked it =)
June, Father's day, Grandpa's 77th birthday, Uncle Nestor, Uncle Andong, Uncle Arnold, and Arnel came up north to pay a visit to Grandpa to celebrate his birthday. Also celebrated with me, Fred, Brad, Charlyn, Erica 1 n 2, JR.. what a fun birthday to spend with my Grandpa, it was nice to know that he loved our company. He was such a great entertainer, I won't ever forget his quote for the night "To the wound that never heals, the harder you pound it, the better it feels..." or even Father's day at Mayflower downtown, how he asked the waiter for a spoon, "Ah, Excuse me, can I please have a spoon, you know the wife of the fork" HAHA.. funny guy..  Fred and I were just becomming closer than ever, everyday was something new, and I liked it.. we were still a secret.. but it was okay, just being with him seemed so much fun and, I felt grown up.. Yes, I feel so grown up with him..
July.. started off fine, Fred and I had spent a lot of time together during his break from school, we had spent a day in San Francisco and spent a night in Gilroy. It brought us closer, and I loved spending so much time with him.. During those days, we got really close, finally alone time together. We discussed so many things about what we wanted in life.. And decided that we both can see each other in our future :) Things were going great. July 4th, Grandpa was sick, I had to call 911 so they could pick him up, because stupid people can't even make a simple phone call when their own FATHER isn't functioning well. My dad, my brother and I were at Methodist hospital for about 2 hours to wait for his condition. I was scared, too scared, because on the radio songs had popped up that I couldn't believe my ears.. "Big girl don't cry" followed by "Say goodbye" you're kidding? I didn't wanna believe.. Luckily Grandpa got sent home, and told us he was just dehydrated. He was advised to drink lots of water.. After that rush and slight heartbreak, I decided to spend a fireworks show with my broadie pals @ Jr's house. Fun night it was.. Finally got to kick it with the boys again since I was always spending so much time with Fred, it was a time to just kick back, chill, and hang with the broadie pals.. I missed them.. July 7th, I woke up to my dad telling me Grandpa wasn't doing so well.. My mom came home really sad, saying things "I think your Grandpa is going to go before your Grandma." I knew something was wrong, but I didn't wanna believe it. We recieved a call from Auntie Melita saying we needed to take him to the hospital, so I rushed to Auntie Melita's house, and I see Grandpa waiting out side, looking so helpless, we help him in the car, my heart is beating fast. His breathing was too good, and there would be times where I wouldnt hear him breathe and I'd get so scared.. What if I dont make it?! What if I get in an accident?! Either way it'll be my fault. I couldn't have this happen.. We got to Methodist ER safely, Luckily there was a nurse out who already had a free wheelchair and helped us take grandpa in right away.. come to find out that his weezing was because he had too much water in his system, when they had sent him home after finding out he was dehydrated they instructed him to drink lots of water, so he did.. n he did alot.. Grandpa was admitted to the ER, I was upset at my mom because she didn't stay, I had returned home at 5. Cried to my cousin, and had Fred pick me up. I spent the rest of my day and night with Fred, I needed to get my mind off of it.. Went home @ 3am, slept for 2 1/2 hrs, and woke up to the scream of my mom...I didn't wanna hear it.. But I did hear the phone ring.. I just thought to myself.. this isn't real.. I got out of bed quickly, and rushed to my parents room, banging on the door.. Daddy opened to the door n I found my mom sobbing, my dad said Grandpa didn't make it.. I broke down.. I didn't wanna believe it.. How could you leave so sudden? I just celebrated with you like a week or 2 ago.. and now you're gone? This can't be.. I lied helpless in the hall way, I didn't think this was real.. MY GRANDPA.. gone.. I woke up my brother, he didn't know what to do either.. I cried. I cried on the way there. I got there.. there he was.. no sign of breath.. no pulse, no belly moving up and down.. I don't here him saying Hello.. He's no longer with us.. what am I gonna do.. I couldn't do it anymore.. my heart was broken again.. and still is.. July 8th, 2007 @ 5:55 am, God had taken my Grandpa to heaven..  The week became hectic, but I had Fred and Tina with me the whole time. Never have I been so stressed out in my life.. I felt so bad because Fred had to spend his last week of vacation mourning with me and my family. But i'm very thankful to have such a caring boyfriend. July 12 was the day the family came down from LA, which was the first day of viewing, the first day they would see Grandpa, laid to rest.. The days kept getting harder, and what sucked the most was the fact that this was the only thing that had brought us together, the death of our Grandpa, which I would say is pretty damn stupid. I know that when we get older, we do our own things, but family is family.. and I know Grandpa always wanted us to be together, but we could never do that because everyone chose to do their own things.. the days seemed to go by fast, tension between the family started to flare.. sometimes i felt like everyone wanted to scream at each other.. Angel and I didnt want to wake up for the morning of July 14, we didn't want to face the day, we didn't wanna say our last goodbyes to our Grandpa. It was a beautiful, yet speedy, ceremony, I know he was proud of me.. I did so much for his funeral, just for him.. Grandpa I know you're reading this... I miss you, and I love you so much, please continue to watch over us k..
-continuing with July, Angel turned the big 2-1 but no real celebration, Fred and I bought her a mini bottle of henessey which we all took shots with her at midnight. They left the next day on her bday. Anna turned 27, Char turned 20, My mom turned the big 50, and Kaelei had turned 1! Jazzy Mae turned 3, there goes halfway of the summer.. I returned back to work that weekend too.. Life was just hard, there wasn't a night where I didn't cry myself to sleep.. I cried so much.. I still couldn't believe my Grandpa was gone.. but I got through the days, Fred was always there for me to comfort me, so he helped me get by..
-August, so officially I'm accepted into Vocational School, Unitek and in 11 months I will be a licensed vocation nurse. Sounds good yeah? Shit i think so. Its about time I got my life on track. CRC wasn't cuttin it for me. I jus continued to work since I started to get more hours, didnt really do much, I would see my bff's at work, so it was always a win win situation for me.. Errol's Birthday, he got really messed up, he turned 27, we bought him a nice cake n card tho.. thanks to team ZECA.. lol Melissa Kate turned 10 on the 23rd.. my god these kids grow up too fast... August went by quickly, last week of August Fred and I had went to LA to visit the family. First time our parents left us alone, since they went to Visalia! Angel and I were on our own for a weekend! And I must say it was awesome!! And I really don't know when that will ever happen again! Haha! One day tho.. one day..
September, Missy turns 23.I would have to say went by way too quickly, It was my last month at Jamba Juice, so I picked up a lot of hours, which made the month go by waaaaaay to fast.. I miss those Jamba jerks tho... they were my other family.. my Jamba Fam... great people they are.. haha i love em..  oh yeah I sprained my ankle, this time my right, BAD BUSINESS, I had to miss out on a 8 hr shift because of it.. GREAT.. i worked the weekend in slippers, haha what a great way to end my days at Jamba!
October, is NOW! I am 20, I have a wonderful boyfriend, and great friends! They're the best and I don't know what I'd do without them! I had dinner @ cheesecake factory and then I had a kickback that weekend. I was trashed. My goodness, it was the first time I had drank in a while, n my ass kept taking shots like it was nothing. My ass couldn't even taste the hen ne more.. I think I took shots with everyone! I had a blast, til I had my emotional breakdown about Grandpa not being able to be at my birthday's anymore. Ugh.. I dont think I'm going to drink til my 21st birthday now.. =/
Haha.. well theres my update for the year almost ending.. this year went by way too fast.. but with all the hardships I faced, it has shown me who is really down for me, and who's there for me. I have wonderful friends who are there for me when I need them the most, and I don't know what I'd do if they weren't a part of my life. My boyfriend,  Fred, I would say, is the best definition of having a great boyfriend. With him I see so much happening for the both of us, and I can honestly say, I see a future with him. I am proud to see that I was able to move on to bigger and better things, and I did it all for myself, and after all the pain I faced, I have someone who is going to make me happy, and make me forget about the bullshit, and focus on what we have. I have such a wonderful boyfriend, and he is the best thing that has happened to me. He takes care of me and tries his best to keep me satisfied, but just being with him is enough. God has blessed me with the best, and I am thankful everyday for bringing him to me. I'm so glad I took this chance with this guy, because it already led me to so many oppurtunities, and its all with him. Its time to be grown up, and with him I can do that. I'M HAPPY. And no one can take that way from me.. I found the one I wanna be with.. and being patient really does work.. :)
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| i'M OFF TO THE PHiLiPPiNES BiTCHES!!!!!!
i'LL BE HOME NEXT YEAR!!! (JANUARY 14, 2006) | | |
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